Feels like I haven't blogged in forever... I'm working on doing things when I am naturally inspired to do so. All year my life has been speaking to me and telling me to make some hard changes but I just could see or understand why it was so necessary to do so. What's even more interesting is whenever I decide to ignore the signals that's when GOD decides to physically show me what's really going on... 

I was gifted a wonderful book by Harriet Lerner called "THE DANCE OF ANGER" (A woman's Guide to changing patterns of intimate relationships). This book was originally published in 1985 and in 2010 found it's way into my life. What i love about it so far is that it forces you to look at the root and true cause of the issues. Let's not forget that Intimate relations are not limited to ROMANTIC relationships. The dance happens with Parents, Siblings, Friends, basically anyone you are close to... "If we do not learn to use our anger first to clarify our own thoughts, feelings, priorities, and choices, we can easily get trapped in endless cycles of fighting and blaming that go nowhere." That statement was HUGE for me... SO often when we are mad or hurt we automatically go into the blame game or try to tell someone how THEY need to change... What's even crazier is the proven FACT that unresolved issues from our past inevitably surface in our current relationships... I won't get to Dr. Phil with it, I just wanted to share the journey I'm on of self-improvement and personal accountability for the emotions that at times have blocked my happiness... 

For example, I just realized (6 months ago) that not having my Dad around for most of my life had a HUGE affect on the way I handled and viewed my romantic relationships... I was the first to be all about my QUEEN Mother and how much of a star she was and still is for raising 9 kids on her own BUT really, even though my parents got divorced when I was 8 years old, had I had even the slightest relationship with my Dad I truly it would and could have saved me some SERIOUS heart aches and BREAKS. Subconscious  fear of Abandonment has kept so many people is toxic relationships... Including me... So I had to go to the root and do the work on me so that those unresolved issues can be solved and I could free myself from reflecting the toxic, insecure energy I was clearing projecting... I'm proud to say, Hallelujah I'm on my way! 

This week I had a HUGE epiphany that caused me to fall back in love with songwriting. I know, you would think that I would have never fallen out of love with the very tool that brought me to you and you to me BUT until this week, I had NO idea what was really going on with me... So I took it back to the old school and simply started writing words. Period. I started expressing TRUE emotions on Paper and did away with trying to write a "Hit." I went back to writing in a notebook rather then on my laptop where I am normally tempted to use my thesaurus and really DIG for what I call a $20 word : ) The reality is I wrote my first songs when I was eleven years old called " I got a fever" because I really had a fever!  Again, had to go back to the root to heal the past issues that inevitably came back... Before I got signed to MCA I was told almost on the daily by a former manager that "My writing was Shit and that I needed to work on my diction." Would you believe that even after writing successful songs for myself and others that voice still resonated in my head that is until this very weak when I had to be accountable for how I chose to respond and react to such abuse. I believed the lie... People PLEASE DON'T BELIEVE THE LIE. Someone may tell you that you are not qualified for a promotion but deep down inside you know you are then GO FOR IT! Someone may tell you that you and your mate will never work out but deep down inside you know you have something real, genuine and special the STAND BY IT. Someone may tell you that you could never afford a mortgage so you should still keep renting when deep down inside you know you can do it THE GO FOR IT! Someone may tell you that you will never lose the weight when deep down inside you know you have what it takes the GO FOR IT. A doctor may tell you that you will NEVER be able to conceived so you should consider adoption but deep down you believe you will be a Mother one day then KEEP TRYING. You  get the drift right??? I was told so many lies that I believed and finally at 32 years old I am affirming that I WILL NOT BELIEVE THE LIE. But in order to not believe it you MUST BELIEVE IN YOU. PERIOD. This is a daily assignment that you will have for life as there will always be an insecure person or people trying to tell you and sell you THE LIE... At the end of the day as my wise mother has often said to me when I am in shock that someone could be so selfish "Thy man does for thyself." 

In my blog I used to take the time to get you all caught up on the "happenings" of Miss Jully Black but I find that unnecessary in the day of Google ; ) I want to use this as a means to let you all into my deepest and purest thoughts. 

Is anyone on Skype? I am thinking of connecting visually with my fans all around the world via SKYPE so if you are on there, feel free to ad me. If you're on twitter follow me so you can know what I'm going on there www.twitter.com/jullyblack 

I'll leave you with these questions that are coming as I am typing...

How are you doing? Do you love yourself. ARe you comfortable in your skin? Are you inspired? Are you Focused? Are you Encouraged? Do you believe in yourself? Are you dreaming? Are you happy? Are you wondering what's really going on with your life? Are you changing the way YOU react and respond to old habits and patterns? Are you purging the excess baggage? What are your priorities? Do you know your current purpose on earth? Are you doing meaningful work?

Take Great care of yourself remember "The easiest person to be is yourself so DARE TO BE YOU." 

Squeezes,

Jully Black